Thursday, 9 January 2014

Why I Love Sad Things


I can really identify with this. The quote comes from the character Sally Sparrow who was in an episode of Doctor Who called Blink. Sally was played by the actress Carey Mulligan (who is apparently an INFJ herself). I've always had a love for things that make me feel sad - songs, musicals, episodes in TV shows, films, books, art, etc, etc. I've recently discovered that the love of sad things is a trait that's very typical for my MBTI type. INFJs are very attracted to sadness - which probably makes us sound crazy. Most people tend to not like things that make them feel sad. So why do INFJs like feeling sad then? Well, because it makes us feel alive. We love things that make us feel very deeply, we love things that make us feel emotion, we love things that make us feel human. We can find beauty in sadness. We're highly emotional and sensitive people and we crave emotional catharsis. So now you know why I love sad things.

P.S. For the record I still love happy and uplifting things as well :)

9 comments:

Xochitl said...

Looks like we've got something in common, though I don't think I know what an INFJ is. (Oh dear, my worldly ignorance is starting to show...) I love the way you explained it, I always had a little trouble explaining to people why I liked sad things.

Sarah said...

Yep, I totally get this too. And I love the quote. :) Although there is a limit to how much "sadness" in something makes me feel that happy-sad feeling. In fact, maybe "sad" isn't the right word... I think "melancholy" might apply better.

Hannah said...

Xochitl - I'm an INFJ which stands for Intoverted, INtuitive, Feeling, Judging. It's my Myers Brigg personality type. There are 16 and mine is believed to be the rarest. I was a bit sceptical about the Myers Brigg thing initially because I thought it might be like astrology signs but it was developed by psychologists so it is based on actual science. And I've found it amazingly accurate and interesting. No person should be defined entirely by their MBTI type but I'll read through the INFJ personality profiles and will be thinking "Yes! Yes! Yes!" at all of the points made. Here's a link for a test if you want to take it:

http://similarminds.com/cgi-bin/newmb.pl

I'd recommend doing some extra googling though: take multiple tests and read personality profiles. I've come up as an INFJ, ISFJ, INFP and an INTP in different tests. But because the INFJ personality profile fits my own the best I'm 100% sure that's what I am :)

Hannah said...

Sarah - Oh I completely agree. There are limits as to what one can take. But INFJs can take melancholy more than most :)

Hamlette said...

Hmm, I wonder if ISFJs have this going on too? I've never come up as anything but ISFJ, but I do have a great love of sad things -- but only ones that have a specific kind of sadness. Non-depressing sadness, if that makes sense. Like Sarah said, melancholy works better, mostly.

For instance, Hamlet. Makes me sad, for the waste of life and potential, for how sad Horatio is at the end. But it's a good sadness, a cathartic sadness that makes me feel... not happy, but sort of emptied. Like an emotional cleansing.

An achingly sad bit of music does the same. I love it, even though it makes me a bit blue.

Hannah said...

I don't know if *many* ISFJs experience this but since you are one then I'm sure it's possible :)

I've been trying to think about things that make me feel happy-sad and things that have left me truly depressed but I don't really know what it *was* about the depressing things that left me so melancholic. I don't know what the key difference is. Maybe the things that left me depressed touched on something raw? I don't know. It's interesting...

Some stories are better for having tragic endings and 'Hamlet' is definitely one of them. I can't even imagine a happy ending for that play. And I love achingly sad music too :)

Hamlette said...

I think pointless or avoidable sad things are what depress me the most. I can never think of a happy ending for Hamlet either -- it's tragic, but inevitable.

The saddest, most depressing movie I have ever seen is Disney's The Fox and the Hound. Tod and Copper are best friends. They vow to always be best friends. And then the stupid adult humans step in and force them to be enemies. Not inevitable, totally avoidable. I HATE that movie.

Xochitl said...

I took a few of them, like you said, and always came out as 'INFP'. I don't know if liking melancholy is an INFP trait too, or what, but it is what it is, I suppose. XD

Hannah said...

Xochiltl - INFJs and INFPs are very similar so that makes a lot of sense :D